(There's a stretch from September 2018 til July 2019 in which my Alexis RPs are gone because they were on the old site. Only thing I have from this period is a CD I did in December 2018 saved in my PMs. And since I need this for context, consider this a Lost Tape)

Disclaimer: This takes place after the last CD I did. There's a general theme here that's muted, but hopefully is picked up on. Good Luck Big O and Enjoy!

ALEXIS QUINNE PRESENTS....................



SETTING: Golden Gate Wrestling Academy
DATE: Sunday, July 1st, 2018
TIME FRAME: Around 7:00 P.M.

[Time waited for no one. And in many cases, when all of us plant our feet into the sand and wonder where has it gone, we realize how much things have changed. From a year, two years, three years, a decade. The world is constantly changing, the trends of today before history tomorrow. New innovations arise, replacing the traditions and establishments of before. Our thoughts, feelings and desires change due to how the world around us has shaped us. Circumstances change, the world around us changes, values and standards change and somehow, someway, we're all in the middle of this, having to adapt accordingly and ask ourselves where do we stand/ What do we want? Who do we want to be?

None of these things mattered to Alexis Quinne growing up. She just wanted to be free. She didn't wan to feel restrictive. She wanted to become everyone people said she couldn't be. The memories of how things used to be, how she was treated in middle school pushed her down a path of resentment. Living a life with a horizontal perspective; comparing herself to others. But that's what everyone does. That;s the way it goes. While we'll trying to adapt and find our places in the world, we're-pitted against one another as a way to drive us. A way to light a spark underneath us to push us towards becoming the best we can be. 

Some are fueled by love.

Alexis was fueled by hate.

Only now it wasn't what she wanted to be the thing that was pushing her forward. Her success, her arrogance, her ego, was all built with the hatred she held in her heart for the people that made her hate herself. That made her feel as if she was less. That's how she thought for a while. That's how she perceived things for a long time. Even now, her default way of thinking was this belief. It had been ingrained into her mind. And one of the reasons why she couldn't completely shake this feeling was that, for some reason, part of her clung to this. A part of her clung to this hatred, this desire to be superior to other people, even after knowing about her mental disorder, knowing about how destruction it's been to her and her relationships.

That's probably the biggest difference from the kid that wanted to be free and express all of her raw feelings and the woman now who wanted to be free mentally, physically, emotionally, socially, etc. The latter were things she ever even thought of. When she was the kid, the 20 year old that joined SCW with the Falconry, she didn't think about where she would be in five years. No one does that age. It's just about exploring and being able to do what you want to do without anyone telling you.

In these last five to six years, she had. An the only thing left was a path of broken relationships, broken promises and heart break.

And she knew this. Her birthday was on June 26, when made her 26. It wasn't long ago that she was 22 years ago, the leader of PUNK HAZARD. 2013 was that long ago; the year she finally graduated from Golden Gate Wrestling Academy and began her journey as a professional wrestler. It was only four year ago when she was living with her sister, Ramona, who was at the time 26 years old. Back when they had some form of a speaking relationship. Now she was getting married and Alexis wasn't included in it.

26 meant she was on the back end of her 20s. She was now closer to 30 than she ever was. All those years of calling people old and now, here she was, having bee in wrestling for six years, with younger aspiring wrestlers coming along, whether from the Bay or in general, and she could no longer call herself the kid. She wasn't a kid anymore. She put away her daggers and her Chucky tributes a long time ago. There was a time when that was her ideal perfect day. Those were simple desires. But this wasn't a simple world and this wasn't a simple time. And throughout these days, her views and her motives and whether or they were right or wrong or whether or not she was a good person or not or whether not the definition didn't have a definitive answer, nothing about her was simple.

You're Gonna Carry That Weight.

As written in the final episode of her favorite anime, Cowboy Bebop, which came from the title of one of the last Beatles song ever created, Carry That Weight. In Cowboy Bebop, Spike comforts his past, realizing his past and his future where one in the same. One final showdown, which he wins, but he's too wounded to live on. Or so it's presented. As he walks away from the battle, with enemies surrounding him, blood dripping down his face, he smiles, whispers "Bang" and falls on the ground. Is he dead? Did he survive? Either way, the older she's gotten, the more meaning that phrase has had on her.

You're Gonna Carry That Weight.

Like Spike, like Faye, like Jet, like Ed and Ein. Like Paul, John, Ringo and George. The weight of their lives, the choices they've made, the views and values that have shaped them, the baggage that they carry, their past, their present, their future, they had to carry all of it. Like her anger. Her hatred. Her need for validation and how much she sacrificed and trampled over others to get it. All of it she had to carry. It still rested on her shoulders like a boulder. That fire still burned inside of her.

As she laid her back on the canvas inside the building that she was molded into a wrestler, Sharon stood above her. Alexis could see her mouth moving, but she wasn't paying attention to what she was saying. Some of the sweat dripping from her face entered into her eyes and she winced because they burned. Alexis used the right hell of her hand to remove the sweat. 

Sharon kept talking, but Alexis had tuned her out. She thought back to Mexico, a few days ago. She finally fought Xander Valentine after a few months of him attacking him, standing up to him and taking the brunt of his physical torture of her. Every time he got a hold of her, Alexis knew to expect pain. She had picked up bruises and bumps from their encounters. She grew up watching SCW so she knew about the carnage and the punishment that he had afflicted on her opponents in the past. He was a legendary figure for a reason. Their war started with him simply looking at her, during an interview, commenting that he didn't see anything special in her and kicked her in the face.

In that brief interaction, Xander represented the source of her anger and hatred. She was told she was less than, promptly attacked and then told there was nothing she could do about it. He didn't care about her as a person because he didn't see a person. He didn't see a human being. He saw someone who was inferior to him and someone who he could push around and not expect any consequences. For her health, she should have backed down. But her ego wouldn't allow it. Not even for a second. Even though she knew Xander could easily end her career and damage her long term health.

Alexis grew obsessed with proving him wrong, fighting him back at every turn. Spitting green mist in his eyes and ruining his chances of main eventing Rise to Greatness were all rooted with the intent of letting him know who she was and that she wasn't someone he could manhandle. It didn't matter how painful it was going against him. Xander needed to feel her. He needed to see first hand what happens when you attack her. 

So that night in Mexico, the night that Xander tried to intimidate Alexis out of, a one on one match with him, that night marked the end. After all the attacks, the beatings, the posturing, the mind games, all of that came to a head. Alexis walked into Mexico fully understanding what Xander Valentine was capable of and yet, she did it anyways. She decided to meet him head on, face to face. As expected, Xander bullied her physically. He tossed her around and was able to do anything and everything he wanted to do to her. He hit just as hard and as fierce as the weeks before.

And yet, in the end, he lost.

To the Jack in a Box Cradle. Alexis caught him making one mistake and took advantage, long enough to hold him down for three seconds. It was a shock to everyone who witnessed the match. Alexis had watched he match over again the following day ad hearing the shock on Adam Sharper ad Jonathan Knots' voice told the story. No one expected Alexis to survive against Xander, let alone walk away with her hand held high as the winner. Xander didn't believe that she had a chance. That's why once it became official that he lost, he had the expression of pure shock written on his face. When Alexis was back peddling to the back, they had locked eyes ad she could see it. She had generally caused the man known for being remorseless to feel something: embarrassed.

And considering what he had done to her, Alexis relished beating him more than anyone since coming back last year. He would have to move on, knowing that between the two of them, his intimidation, his reputation, his physical dominance, didn't mean anything. Because between the two of them, Alexis was better. Alexis walked out the winner. And knowing it wasn't this thing that was made up out of thin air but a fact only validated that feeling of accomplishment inside of Alexis. He could try to deny it, but everyone saw it. it was history. It was a fact.]

Sharon[talking to Alexis]: "Hey...hey!"[The last 'hey' snapped Alexis from her thoughts and brought her back to her current situation. Her entire body felt sore as if she had ran a 5k marathon. She blinked a few times before letting out a sigh and placing her hands on the top of her forehead.]

Sharon: "Did you even listen to a fucking word that I said?"[Alexis immediately responded with a delayed laughter.]

Alexis[unsure how to answer]: "Yeah......yeah...I got you. I'm here. I got you."

Sharon: "What I say then?"[When she flipped it back to Alexis, she then found additional strength to lift her body off the canvas and into a seated position. From here, she continued laughing a bit, even uncomfortably. Sharon was just simply glaring at her face. Alexis couldn't stop chuckling, realizing she was caught in a lie. If anyone knew when Alexis was lying, it was Sharon given the fact that they've known each other for almost seven years now. That was a long time to learn someone's tendencies, new and old. Anything Alexis did around her wasn't anything brand new to Sharon. That's how it is when you have as much time spent together with someone the way Alexis and Sharon shared.]

Alexis; "I don't fucking know."

Sharon: "I know you don't fucking know because you zoned out."[Another chuckle escaped her mouth. Sharon responded by doing the same.]

Sharon: "I was saying good shit the other night...against Xander."[Once Sharon muttered his name, a smirk grew on Alexis' face. Her body grew all warm and fuzzy. Before, when she heard his name, it stirred up the anger inside of her. But after Wednesday, his name was now associated with a new feeling, with a new thought. He wasn't this oppressor opposing his will against her anymore. He was someone who couldn't do anything to her. Xander was now the man who lost to Alexis. The man who, despite ending the careers of so many before her, fell short of doing the same to her. Now when she heard Xander Valentine's name, she smiled because she knew Xander was powerless. His intimidation couldn't stop her. His tactics couldn't derail her.

Alexis' eyes drifted towards the canvas for a moment before she popped her head back up to Sharon. With a wide smirk on her face, Alexis ran a hand through her sweat drenched hair.]

Alexis: "What did you think, huh? Did you think I had a chance? Seriously, you don't have to say yeah to make me feel good. You don't have to bullshit me. Did you think I could do it?"

Sharon: "No."[Something about Sharon's quick answer drew another laugh from Alexis. Maybe it was because of how straight forward it was or maybe it was because it didn't take much time for her to even consider the question.]

Alexis[sarcastically]: "Well fuck, did you even bother thinking about it?"[Sharon cracked a smile of her own as she slowly back peddled until her sweat drenched grey t-shirt laid against the red ropes.]

Sharon; "You asked me a question and I told you. You didn't have to ask me about now bullshitting you. When's the last time I've ever done that to make you feel good, princess?"[Sharon winked at Alexis, playing along with her further.]

Sharon: "Seriously though, bullshit aside, I didn't know what to expect or what would happen. I know where you're at in terms of your skills. We do this like every week. You're as good as you've ever been. You're probably better now than you were when PUNK HAZARD was around or when you won the World Title. I'm not even fucking joking. You take calculated risk now. There was a time where trying to convince you to dial shit back felt like fucking pulling teeth. But now, it's like all those years of me and Alex telling this shit to you is starting to get to your head. Because you're seeing the same shit we see. The older you get and the more you do this, the smarter you become. The more shit you see and the less shit surprises you. So I knew you had the skills to match up with him."[Sharon pressed her lips briefly while removing a few strands of hair from her sight.]

Sharon: "It really came down to what the fuck was going through your head because these days....there's a lot of shit going on. There's always something with you. That's just who you are. You're never able to just not be doing shit. I know you've been trying to do all this social conscious shit and the shit about Trump or whatever the fuck. And honestly, I know the drive and the passion you had for this, the same drive you had to become one of the top names in the business isn't the same like it used to be. Understandably. With the way PH ended, that was a given. So you have different priorities you know You used to be obsessed with being better than Dawn or being better than Autumn or worrying that no one respected you. You don't talk about maintaining your spot n SCW anymore. Those talks we had about doing whatever t takes to stay where you are...we don't have those anymore.  You're not as hungry as you used to be. That's just the truth. You know that for a fact too."[Alexis saw as Sharon dropped to the canvas so she could sit down with Alexis and be able to stare at her at the same eye level.]

Sharon: "So I didn't know what to expect because, you know, Xander has made a career of fucking gong through everyone. I'm not saying he's the fucking Boogeyman like everyone does but people fear that guy for a reason. And the one thing I did know was that you wasn't going to lay down, that you wasn't going to back down. Alex and I taught you better than that."[Sharon briefly chuckled, which drew the same reaction from Alexis.]

Sharon: "But nah that's you. You're stubborn as fuck. People I bet online was telling you not to fight him. Shit he was telling you not to fight him. I knew you wouldn't listen. You barely listen to me or Alex. It's a blessing and a curse. All I knew was that you wouldn't listen and that you were going to give him everything that you had. Whatever that was,  only you know. I just knew whatever you were feeling that day, that's what was going to show up."[Alexis rubbed her face with her left hand while keeping eye contact with Sharon.]

Alexis[in a firm tone]: "And then I beat that fucker."[When she said it, there was this feeling of knowledge, this security that came with saying what she said. Because now she knew. Between her and Xander, the question of who won come out on top was answered. The answer was her. She would win. She would come out on top. It would be her, not the Hall of Famer. Not the Executioner. Not the fabled destroyer. It was the girl from San Fran, the smallest person on the SCW roster.]

Alexis[smirking]: "I beat that guy. I sent that fucker up the ramp, knowing he lost to me. Knowing all that shit he tried against me didn't do shit for him in the end. When I saw his face, after I beat him, I could tell that he didn;t think that was going to happen. I saw his eyes man, it was crazy. All this time he was trying to scare me and shit and act like he was this emotionless killer or something. But when I beat him and I looked in his eyes, I didn't see a killer. I saw a dude who had to accept it. He had to accept the fact that he lost. That he lost to me. That I beat him. Me of all people. Knowing that when he went to sleep, he was thinking about me and what I did to him...that type of shit is what makes it better. Because now he knows....he knows what's going to happen if he tries that shit again. "[Alexis retained the wry smile on her face as Sharon pulled herself off the mat.]

Sharon[mockingly]: "Relax Lexi, you only got him on a fucking Small Package."[The two shared a laugh as Alexis then found a way to pull herself up from the mat.]

Sharon: "I gotta make sure you're humble enough. It's my job to knock you down a little bit when you're feeling yourself."

Alexis: "Whatever. If that clumpnugget wants to fuck with me again, he knows what's going to happen. That Hall of Fame ring ain't do shit to me. That don't mean shit to me. In the ring, he couldn't do enough. He thought it would but it didn't He thought it would go one way...but it went the other way."[Sharon couldn't remember the last time she felt this confident. That's why she chuckled. Alexis gave Sharon a puzzled expression.]

Alexis[confused]: "The fuck is so funny?"[Sharon continued to chuckle.]

Sharon: 'You. I don't know the last time you said that fucking word."

Alexis: "Said what?"

Sharon: "Clumpnugget. I remember when you used to say that shit every other sentence. Like you were one of those fucking dolls you pull the string and then they say whatever catchphrase they're suppose to say."[Sharon soon began existing out of the ring.]

Alexis: "Whatever."

Sharon: "You're funny. I mean, you're feeling yourself. I get it. I'm not trying to shit on it. I'm happy for you. Anyways, I'm going to head out. I don't know if you were planning on staying or anything but-"

Alexis:[interrupting her]: "Nah. I'm leaving too."

Sharon: "Cool. So I'll lock up then."[Alexis then slowly rolled out of the ring until she was able to place her two feet on the mats. Once she did, she looked at Sharon and gave her a brief salute. For some reason, she felt compelled to look around the room. She wasn't sure why. She knew how this placed looked like the back of her hand. She could tell someone everything that was on the walls, from pictures of every graduating class to frames of Sharon and Alexander in the ring, the dumbbells to the sides, the punching bag, the whole nine. This place was essentially her second home. And in that brief moment, it came to Alexis. Now that July was here, it meant there was less than a year before Alex and Sharon and the school was moving to two S.O.T.A. buildings near Oracle Arena. Alex was the one that told Alexis a year ago and she hadn't thought about it as much. Until now for some reason. Over time this place held some of Alexis' proudest and even hardest moments of her life. And within a year, she would never step foot in this building again. On one end, the fact that the city was providing Alex an update ad his own building, one for GG proper and the other from MAX, almost a direct result to the success of the last two World Hazards, was a dream come true. On the other end, despite the fact that moving into those buildings would be a upgrade on every level, Alexis felt Golden Gate belonged in one place. This place. Sandwiched together in downtown San Francisco between a barber shop and a hair salon. But, nothing stayed the same and time did't wait for anyone.

Since Alexis didn't carry her gym bag with her, she simply grabbed her keys hat were on the apron and started heading towards the door. Before she approached it, she turned around to locate Sharon.]

Alexis: "Next week you're free right?"

Sharon: "I should be. I don't think I have anything planned. I'll let you know though. I'll text you."

Alexis:"Yeah we;ll figure that shit out."

Sharon: "Yeah. That sounds good."

Alexis: "Cool."

Sharon: "Yeah."

Alexis: "Alright. Later.[And with that, Alexis pushed the door forward and walked out. Once she was outside on the sidewalks, she twisted her head to the left, as she had parked her Green Mustang GT a few steps ahead of the school. Some people were walking past her on the sidewalks. She shifted her body towards that direction and headed towards her car.]

????: "Alexis....oh shit...Alexis!"[An unknown voice called out to her. Alexis immediately whipped around to see who it was. She turned her head to the left and the to the right, trying to identity this person. Eventually, standing by the wooden electricity pole was a young girl, dressed in a simple white t-shirt with blue jeans and short black hair that barely touched the back of her neck, holding a white flyer in her hands. Alexis's eyes narrowed as this girl stared up at her, Alexis was trying to gauge as to how old this girl could be and she settled on at least 18, if not younger. Most importantly, Alexis had never seen this girl before in her life. Alexis stepped closer to this girl until they were a few feet apart, that way they could hear each other instead of standing across from one another with people passing them by.]

Girl: "Oh shit...it actually is you. I took that was you when I walked by and saw you in the ring. I didn't think that was actually you."

Alexis[unsure of what to say]: "Uh....who are you?"[Maybe she was a fan, she thought. However, Alexis' eyes drifted downward at the paper this girl was holding and sure enough, it was a flyer promoting the school. The last class graduated a few weeks ago, which meant enrollment for the fall had just begun.]

Alexis: "I mean...I'm not trying to be rude or whatever but I'm busy and...I don't know if you want an aut-"

Girl: "I don't want a fucking autograph."[Her tone was firmer than Alexis expected. When she dropped the F-bomb, t caused Alexis to juke back a bit. This girl had some bite to her. There were a million thoughts racing through Alexis' mind, however, she decided to simply allow them to remain thoughts and just chose not to say anything.]

Girl: "You guys are accepting enrollments right now right?"[Alexis looked at and loosened her stance a bit.]

Alexis: "Yeah...that's...what the flyer stays right?"

Girl: "I want to enroll."[Alexis briefly rubbed the back of her neck with her left hand.]

Alexis: "OK...cool. Uh...I'm not the person you have to talk about about that stuff. Sharon's in there though ad if you got the...[Alexis paused herself when she thought about the question of how old was this girl.]

Alexis: "How old are you?"[The girl seemingly let out an annoyed sigh when asked. This was coupled with rolling her eyes at Alexis.]

Girl: "I'm old enough."[Alexis let out a small chuckle. This girl had an attitude to her. Alexis still wasn't sure what to make of this yet but it was happening and she wasn't backing away.]

Alexis: "OK but that doesn't answer my question."

Girl: "Why do yo need to know?"

Alexis: "I'm just asking. Shit...I'm not interrogating you alright? I'm not. I'm just saying...like if you're trying to enroll and be apart of the next class and shit, you gotta be 16 or older."

Girl: "What are you trying to say?"

Alexis: "That you need to be 16 or older to enroll."[The girl crossed her arms in a dismissive fashion.]

Girl:"What are you trying to say though? Are you saying I don't look like I'm 16?"

Alexis: "Is that what I asked or did you assume that?"[Alexis found herself starting to get worked up in the moment. This girl's attitude and tone in their conversation was the biggest reason why. She seemed hostile and testy, even temperamental or rebellious. One thing Alexis had learned over time was to hear not just people were saying but what they weren't saying because a lot of times, the words they didn't speak often filled the gaps of the words that were spoken couldn't fill.]

Girl: "I'm 17 but I'm going to be 18 in August. I'm about to be a senior."[And there it was. Finally. An answer.]

Alexis: "You're about to be a senior. What school you go to?"

Girl: "Galileo[Academy]."

Alexis: "Ah you go there?"

Girl: "Yeah it's a fucking shitshow. You got boys constantly try to fuck you and convince you that they care. You got the people who cut class so they can smoke weed and get high. Delusional bitches who think everything revolves around them. Like I said, a shit show."[Alexis couldn't contain her laughter in response to how this girl was describing her high school experience. It was so similar to her experience.]

Alexis: "So where do you fit into all of that?[The girl stared at Alexis and shrugged her shoulders.]

Girl: "I'm just the girl in between it all."[To some, that response could be taken as arrogant or suggesting that she was above everything and everyone. Alexis, however, didn't believe that was the case. Or at least, this was her first impression of her.]

Alexis: "Huh...yeah high school is the dirt worst right? I feel like if you actually liked being in high school, then you were that asshole that made everyone hate high school."

Girl: "Exactly."[The girl cracked a smile.]

Girl: "I can't wait til I graduate."

Alexis: "I bet. I went to Abe [Lincoln] and it was the same way. I feel like that shit doesn't really change much, you know? But nah I knew some people from Galileo. It just seemed like the same shit I was dealing with at Abe."

Girl: "It probably was."[Alexis then dropped her hands to her sides.]

Alexis: "I don't think I eve asked you what you name is. Obviously you know me but yeah, what's your name? I'm sorry."

Girl: "Veronica. Veronica Maize."

Alexis[matter of fact]: "Veronica."[Alexis kept her eyes on the girl named Veronica. A thought popped up into her mind, which was to offer her hand to her. Alexis' right hand started to shake a bit in response. That was the thing you did when someone introduced themselves for the first time. That's what you do to show respect. But Veronica wasn't a high end, business man or adult even. She was soon to be high school senor. She was a kid, who probably didn't view herself as that. But, in the grand scheme of life, Alexis and Veronica were one two different sides of the spectrum.]

Alexis: "OK....Veronica....."[Alexis kept her right hand to her side. Shaking her head would be weird and potentially out of place.]

Alexis: "You want to enroll right? Are you a fan? You know, of wrestling and whatever...why do you want to do it?"[Alexis kept her lips pressed to each other before she continued rambling questions to Veronica. Veronica looked at the flyer again before looking back at Alexis.]

Veronica: "Yeah, something like that."[Veronica turned her head back to Golden Gate. Alexis was led to do the same.]

Alexis: "What do you mean?"[Alexis noticed how Veronica was staring at the school and long her gaze remained on the sign above the door.]

Veronica: "Like, I used to not even watch this shit. I thought it was fucking lame and stupid. I had an ex that was really into it. It was sad and I should have broke up with him way sooner than I did."

Alexis: "He was an asshole?"

Veronica: "Shit, I wished he was. He didn't like to anger or be mad and shit. He didn't really stand up for himself. He just...he just let things be. He was always ask me what I wanted to do for dates instead of fucking planning something. Which I don't really understand. You know, not having an idea in your head of where you're taking your girlfriend. And when i would fucking bring it up, he would just try to shut it down. I could tell it made him uncomfortable. People think a girl wants someone that's going to pamper them and buy nice shit for them. It's bullshit. I don't that fairytail shit, you know? I want something that's real, even if it's messy. Even if I'm messy, I want to argue, I want to fight. I want someone to show they fucking care and that they're not going to back down. But...fuck"[Veronica stopped herself from talking further.]

Veronica: "That's. not..I got on a tangent. Yeah so...he was into wrestling...this was like two years ago and whatever. Summer time hit and he got these tickets to this show, World Hazard right? It had wrestling and anime and art and fashion, all that shit. He was into the anime and wrestling shit and I wasn't. I heard there was rave going on later and that was good enough for me. People wearing in tight spandex and underwear? Fuck that. But I was like alright, I can do something for him so maybe he'll do something for me later. So I go, later in the day and t was whatever. People are dressed up in all these weird costumes and shit and it wasn't my scene. But I did it because again, I do something for you, you do something for me. So, later on, everyone has to go to the building because the wrestling is there and I'm not thinking shit of it. But...being in that crowd and everyone's losing their shit and cheering and the DJ is playing music and then even some of the matches, you know, people fighting to the end, until they're getting knocked out, hearing you talk about what yo and your friends did to even be able to do something like that...I don't know what it was but...it got me."[She chuckles.]

Veronica: "I can't really explain it because, and I'm not saying that I'm a super fan and shit because I'm not. I watch it. Not regularly, but I watch it. My brother Liam thinks I'm lame for watching something that's fake and he's older than me by the way, and, yeah so he gives me shit for it. And I just tell him, because he's into comic book movies and shit, that he cried about people turning to dust and none of that shit was real. The difference between that and wrestling was that it is real. I saw it, that night. Everyone had a reason to fight and shit and they gave everything they had. So, the more I think about it, the more I'm like you know what, I want to punch people in the face. College doesn't do it for me. My grades aren't that great anyways but...yeah I mean that's why."[Veronica ran a hand through her hair. Alexis thought about what she had just heard. How the first wrestling show Veronica had ever went to was the first World Hazard and it was because of that show that started her gradual interest in it and now to the point where she wanted to enroll and become one. Things that Alexis didn't think about two years ago when she was trying to get t off the ground.]

Alexis: "Yeah...it does that to yo, yo know? Wrestling. I got into it when I was a freshman. There's nothing you can compare it to. A lot of people try to compare t to MMA or sports or moves and shit and it doesn't do it justice."

Veronica: "Yeah exactly."

Alexis: "Well I mean, you're coming to the right place. Alex and Sharon know what they're doing. I mean, they're also not to bullshit you and they'll call you out on your shit and-"

Veronica[interrupting]: "I don't want them to train me."[Alexis stopped in her tracks and her eyes widened. Her statement registered with Alexis. Alexis' eyes narrowed once more. If she didn't want Sharon or Alex to train her....]

Veronica: "I want to be trained by you."[Then that meant that she wanted to be train by Alexis herself. Exactly what she expected. A lot of immediate thoughts swelled inside her head, different response she could say out loud. She could hear all of them because of the voice in the back of her head telling her how she could respond. Regardless, her face crunched up unknowngly to her but not to Veronica.]

Veronica: "Why are you making that face?"

Alexis:[off guard]: "Huh?...What?"[Veronica scoffed and folded her arms. Her face tightened immediately.]

Veronica: "What...do you think I can't do it or something?[Her eyes never left Alexis. It was as if she was forcing Alexis to respond on defense, backing her up to a proverbial corner.]

Alexis[defensive]: "Nah...nah that's not...nah that-"

Veronica: "Am I too small? Do I don't look like I can take a punch or something bec-"

Alexis: "No, no,no, no. That's not it. I mean...shit I'm like 5'2. We're about the same height. You probably weigh more than I do. Height and size...all that shit means nothing."

Veronica:"So why the fuck are you making that look like..like-like I'm crazy or something for wating you to train you?"

Alexis: "I don't train people. I don't do that really."

Veronica: "You do MAX right?"[She knew about MAX so maybe that meant she's listened to a couple of Alexis' promos or follow her on Twitter.]

Alexis: "Used to. But I don't do that shit anymore. Besides, MAX is for people who fail GG proper ad get a secon chance. Sharon does MAX. She's in there so yo-"

Veronica: "I don't want them to train me. i mean, you're small as fuck and you find a way to kick their ass and shit. I want to do that. You made it look fun."

Alexis: "I'm sorry but I don't do that anymore really. I jst don't?

Veronica: "Why?"[Alexis laughed a bit harshly because there was a lot to answer from that question. She didn't want to bog Veronica mind with everything that she knew from personal experience. That's why the longer this went on, the warmer Alexis felt inside. The more her blood started to boil.]

Alexis: "You wouldn't understand and that might sound like some bullshit excuse but it's the truth."

Veronica: "Explain it to me. Teach me. I don't fucking care. I can handle it."

Alexis: "You're like 17, you can't handle shit. You're just a fucking kid!"[Alexis' voice raised a bit, drawing the ire of Veronica. Alexis could tell because she reacted by biting her bottom lip at the term "kid.]

Alexis: "You still live with your parents and you're still under their roof and their rules. They protect you and look after you and take care of you. When you get into wrestling, that shit stops. People don't care about you, people don't look after you. And the people that do, you gotta look over your shoulder to make sure they're not sticking a knife in your back. Even when you're succeeding, people are trying to drag you down. Even if you win titles and win big matches and make money, t doesn't change how people view yo. All that shit is circumstantial. That shit changes over time. All that doesn't add up in the long run. That show you were at two years ago,  helped make t happen. I came up with it and that didn't stop me from getting a fucking death threat for speaking up about racism. It's more than just what you see, it's about being willing to be involved with fucking sharks. The game is rigged."[There was a lot more that she wanted to say as they were coming to mind, but she stopped. As she was talking, she thought about how she was feeling about beating Xander. It felt good. It felt so good. But what did it mean in the long run? It meant her ego was boosted, sure. But did that generally bring happiness? Would that last? Would that change the fact that she had a mental disorder? And that she's be ignoring her Mom's calls? Or that Ramona doesn't want anything to do with her? Or how she's viewed socially? Or how people of color are viewed socially? Over time, things change and feelings change. The things that gave Alexis the most joy now had a twisted meaning. Actually, it showed the true picture, not just all good or all bad. But the truth.]

Veronica: "Well if you feel that way, why do you still do it then?"[Alexis remained silent. For the city, for the Bay Area community. To bring new ideas and widen people's thoughts on what can and can't happen in wrestling. To see her platform to speak out on social injustice? All things she had said in the past. Even things she still felt in a way. But, there's a third World Hazard about to happen later this month, the first in which she has absolutely no involvement in. More people from the scene are making their way into the main wrestling promotions. Alexis was a driving force in all of this happening, but she no longer was the engine that was keeping it going. It was moving without her, which is what she wanted. All of that is bigger than her. But...where did that leave her?]

Veronica: No one makes you do shit. No one can make us do anything. We all have choices. If this makes you feel that way, why do you do it?"[Despite their age difference, it was Alexis who found herself speechless and without a true answer to give her. She could tell her a lie but that only goes so far. She dd not have an answer to this question and thus, she didn't say anything.]

Veronica: "I want to do this. And I don't want anyone telling me not to. I've made up my mind. I'm doing this and I want to do t here and I want you to train me. I'll keep coming every Sunday if you're going to be here at this time and I'm going to convince you to do it. One way or the other."[Veronica dropped her arms to the side ad slowly started backing away.]

Veronica: "See ya soon.'[And she turned her back to Alexis and started walking away. Alexis observed this, still frozen in her spot.]

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