The Most Valuable Friendship vs. The Silent Majority

[Konrad Raab]

Aubrianna Powers & Gavin Taylor vs. Ricky James & Lucy Huckabee-Sanders

4 RP limit for tag

Deadline: 11:59:59 pm ET Tuesday, September 1, 2020

[The MVP]

https://simplythebestpowers.blogspot.com...tions.html

[Corner G]

Gavin Taylor 

and the 

Absolutely, Completely Random, Totally Unplanned Media Scrum

(Click it)

[Ricky James]

“Alright sir, here is your room key. You are in room 413, 4th floor off the ele-”


RJ: I think I got it, thanks. Anything to do around this town that doesn’t have to do with corn?

“Well sir, in this brochure you’ll find an extensive list of nearby sites, tourist attractions, restaurants…”

RJ: I already see a picture of corn. It’s alright. Nebraska is what it is. At least I am in the heart of America. A couple weeks back I was stuck in Canada. If you ever wanted to know what it feels like to be in hell, go ahead and visit Canada for a few days. Actually, you only need a few seconds. Once you’ve crossed the border you already get the gist of it.

“Well sir I can say I’ve never been-

RJ: Yeah, it’s probably better you stay in America. Thanks anyway.

Ricky James grabs his room key from the hotel front desk and heads toward the elevators. Before he can get on the elevator, his phone rings. Ricky pulls his phone out of his pocket, smiles, and answers.

RJ: Ms. Sanders….you land yet?

LHS: Just got off the plane. And now I’m wondering why the hell I am here…

RJ: Hey, better than a few weeks ago, right? 

LHS: Yeah, but that’s not saying much.

RJ: Fair enough. Good flight? How’d it go with him?

LHS: Oh it worked out great. I reminded him where I had to travel this week and just hearing “Nebraska” was enough to keep him home.

RJ: Glad we won’t have to deal with that this time. Anyway, we all set for the EPC? 

LHS: Oh yeah. I got a great little venue downtown. Kellyanne is working on getting everyone together. They’ll be there in two hours.

RJ: Perfect. How long until you’re here?

LHS: 45 minutes. I’m already set so once I check in we can head over shortly after.

RJ: Sounds good. See you then. I l-

Ricky abruptly stops and hangs up the phone. He gets on the elevator and heads up to the 4th floor. After getting off the elevator, finding his room, and walking inside, he tosses his bag down onto the bed and grabs the remote. Ricky turns on the TV and surfs the channels until he hits Fox News, which he leaves on as he turns his attention to his bag. He begins to unpack clothes and some wrestling gear. As he continues to make his way through the bag, Ricky suddenly stops, staring at something at the bottom of the bag. Ricky starts to get angry and shakes his head.

RJ: Another one?! NO!

Ricky then violently grabs the bag and throws it off the bed against the window. Still shaking a bit, Ricky takes a few deep breaths to calm himself. Having regained his composure, he lays down on the bed to relax and watch Special Report with Brett Baier. 

---------------------------------

1 hour later

Ricky, half asleep, hears a knock at his door. He jumps up out of the bed to answer. Lucy Huckabee Sanders stands in the doorway, face covered in makeup with red lipstick, wearing a red pants suit. 

LHS: You ready?

RJ: Yeah, I was just relaxing a bit. I’m good.

LHS: Good. Our ride is waiting for us downstairs.

Ricky grabs a few personal belongings before heading out with Lucy. The two head downstairs and walk out the front of the lobby. They get into their Uber and the car drives off.

----------------------------------

20 minutes later

The car pulls up to a small venue in an undisclosed location just outside of downtown Omaha. The driver steps out of the vehicle and opens the back door to let Lucy Huckabee Sanders and Ricky James out. 

RJ: This is it, huh?

LHS: Yeah, but it’ll look much better on the inside.

RJ: How did you even secure this place?

LHS: Kellyanne took care of it.

RJ: How?

LHS: This was originally some LGBTACBQRS rally, nonsense, so she called ahead to the group putting it on and said two crazy people named Gavin and Aubrianna were threatening to bomb the place because they hated gay people.

RJ: Okay, but won’t this place be empty then?

LHS: That’s the beauty of it, she called in the threat but also called the press to tell them it was all a facade to draw in some publicity to their cause.

RJ: And?

LHS: And everyone will be here, why are you questioning it?

RJ: It just...doesn’t make sense?

LHS: It makes sense if you don’t think about it. 

Ricky stops and just stares at Lucy, not knowing how to respond to her. Her steely eyes are telling him to stop questioning it and just go along with it. He shrugs his shoulders instead and continues the conversation. 

RJ: ...It sounds like a great plan, though you know it’s a shame we can’t reason with these people, but we’re going to have to do things like this as long as these people stay brainwashed. Everything else good to go?

LHS: Everything is perfect. I spoke to Kellyanne and the last thing she was doing was ripping down that hideous rainbow atrocity and is replacing it with the Stars and Bars, and then also an American flag. But, the stage, podium, mic, everything else is ready to go.

RJ: Great, let’s do this.

The Silent Majority walk into the venue. Lucy leads the way inside the second door on the right, where a group of reporters await. Upon seeing Lucy and Ricky, the reporters turn their attention to the stage. Lucy and Ricky walk up onto the stage, which has two American flags in stands on either side of the podium, a Confederate flag flanking those and then, a long, flowing, comically large American Flag with the letters “TSM” sewn into the middle white stripe. Lucy and Ricky walk up to the podium and then address the group.

LHS: We have called this EMERGENCY PRESS CONFERENCE to address and answer your questions about our upcoming match on Breakdown. We would just like to say a few words before we get to your questions.

Lucy pauses and turns toward Ricky, who sighs and shakes his head before speaking.

RJ: I wish we were entering our debut match under better circumstances. We gave an ultimatum to Shady Sasha. Either put me in a match, or face a lawsuit. Believe me, Sasha did not want a lawsuit. Nobody files a lawsuit better than The Silent Majority.

LHS: Shady Sasha is LUCKY this time. Ricky ended up finding his way into a match...

Lucy pauses and glares at Ricky before continuing.

LHS: A tag team match against Gavin Taylor and Aubrianna Powers.

Ricky, seemingly oblivious to the look Lucy gave him, puffs his chest out as he begins to speak again.

RJ: Like the real Americans we are, we decided to take it upon ourselves to seize an opportunity. Shady Sasha has held us patriots back long enough. This week on Breakdown, Shady Sasha, the SCW, and most importantly, the United States of America, will all witness the beginning of The Silent Majority’s mission to rid SCW of its socialist sickness and restore true AMERICAN values to the federation.

LHS: And like we said, Shady Sasha is so desperate to make a statement at our expense to the point of also putting me into this match. Even more so, she thinks it is fair to pit me against not just another woman, but also a man. I was told this is commonplace in SCW, but I have yet to see any mixed gender confrontation anywhere else. At this time we will take your questions.

The eager blonde reporter we have seen in previous Emergency Press Conferences, sitting right in front, immediately shoots her hand up. 

LHS: Yes, Kellyanne, please. 

Kellyanne: Ms. Sanders, Mr. James - what are your thoughts specifically on your opponents this week, Gavin and Aubrianna?

RJ: I respect Gavin Taylor as much as anyone can respect an immigrant who managed to get into this great country legally. But, this isn’t too much respect. However, I admire his decision to leave that socialist cesspool Canada in order to achieve his American Dream in the United States. Now, he is not a REAL American like us. He never will be. And he certainly does not deserve the same opportunities as real Americans. 

LHS: So this is why we are a bit confused as to why they’re calling themselves the Most Valuable Powers when they clearly aren’t even Americans. 

RJ: Exactly! Great point, Lucy. Setting aside his unfortunate Canadian past, I will say Gavin tries his best to be a good American. He seizes opportunities, just like us. He does not look for handouts like a lot of these SCW superstars and the majority of Canadians. He doesn’t have that “groupthink” approach. Gavin doesn’t need to surround himself with other people to get ahead in life or in SCW.

Some of the reporters in the back roll their eyes.

RJ: Aubrianna Powers, quite frankly, has no business in this match. I admire her courage and determination. She is a true American through and through. But let’s be honest here. She is a woman. She should not be in a match with a man, and I do not know if I feel comfortable laying my hands on a woman. 

A reporter interjects.

Reporter: So if Aubrianna is tagged into the match, will you tag Lucy in immediately or will she be forced into the match?

RJ: I really hope it does not come to that. It is unfair for Lucy to be in this match as well. I was looking for a singles match. We said that. I never agreed to have this tag match. I would never agree to putting Lucy in harm's way like that, especially considering that Aubrianna is a very nasty woman.

Reporter: Mr. James, we have you on tape agreeing to a tag match…

RJ: FAKE NEWS! You are once again doctoring footage. What I agreed to was a one on one, Man vs. Man match with Gavin Taylor. If he wanted to have Aubrianna at ringside with him, that is fine. I understand her standing by him, much like Lucy Huckabee Sanders was ready to be in my corner. I do not know how this turned into a tag match, but I suspect Shady Sasha had something to do with it. She is worried about this new “PC” culture and felt like she had to include the women.

Reporter: Don’t you think that is a little sex-

Ricky angrily cuts the reporter off.

RJ: That was a very nasty comment. I have nothing against women! I love women. Women deserve opportunities….against other women. It is just completely unfair to place a woman in a match with a man. And on top of that, we made it very clear that Lucy Huckabee Sanders would be in a managerial role. 

Another reporter puts his hand up, and Lucy motions for him to go ahead.
 
Reporter: The Most Valuable Friendship are saying this will be the PERFECT debut for Aubrianna Powers. Do you agree with that?

LHS: Unfortunately for Miss Powers, she will have her debut match against someone of my caliber. So, in my honest opinion, yes this is a perfect debut for her. She gets to share this space with The Silent Majority. 

Reporter: Okay, but Lucy, in all fairness, this is also going to be your first match in your wrestling career. Do you think that puts you and Ricky at a disadvantage?

LHS: How dare you! I have the most experience, the best experience and quite honestly the finest experience in this company. Who are you to question my qualifications? 

Reporters: Well, I only ask because you haven’t had any wrestling experience prior to this -

LHS: And what’s your point? My point is exactly what I said it was. Shady Sasha tricked Ricky into agreeing into this preposterous match.

Reporter: Lucy, you seem to be going in circles with this, it’s a simple question. Do you think that your lack of wrestling experience is putting you at a disadvantage?

LHS: I don’t see what me never having wrestled a match has to do with us being at a disadvantage? In this present day and age, one can manifest their own destiny by just believing in it enough. 

Ricky: And with plenty of thoughts and prayers.

LHS: Yes, Ricky. Thank you, with thoughts and prayers as well, we can accomplish anything.

Reporter: So your strategy then...is thoughts and prayers?

LHS: What else would I need in the ring? If He is on our side, then there is no stopping us. These godless Canadians won’t even know what hit them.

Reporter: Are you also saying that God is on your side?

LHS: God is on the side of any patriotic American. So you can imagine how much he’s got our backs in this match.

Reporter: Okay, but Lucy, you have yet to answer us on the question of your experience.

LHS: I just told you about my experiences.

Reporter: Your experiences include thoughts and prayers, having God on your side and your patriotism?

LHS: Next.

Reporter: I would like to yield my time back to the reporter whose question you have yet to answer.

Ricky jumps back in.

RJ: The setup of this match is anything but perfect. As I said, this should have been a one on one match with myself taking on Gavin. But even if that were the case, it still would not be perfect. Gavin, despite his efforts, will never be a true American. A perfect match would always consist of two true Americans going toe to toe. 

Ricky briefly pauses, then continues.

RJ: You will see perfection in this match, however. You will see perfection on display when Gavin Taylor finds out first hand what it is like to wrestle a true American. We all know real Americans are the best athletes in the world. 

Reporter: Are you familiar with Gavin Taylor’s athletic background? He was a multi-sport athlete and is one of the best wrestlers in the world.

RJ: Once again with the fake news. Gavin Taylor is very athletic. He does excel in multiple sports....Canadian sports. He is a great hockey player and maple syrup harvester. One of the best in the world, though? Far from it. I am sure he was one of the best in Canada, and I am sure one of the reasons he left was to seek better competition. Being one of the best athletes in Canada is like winning the Special Olympics, though. Canadian athletes do not compare to American athletes. I don’t care how long he has been in this country. 

Reporter: And is there anything you’d like to say back to Gavin? He made mentions of you and Lucy and how you two can be happy in knowing that you lost to the best SCW Mayhem Tag Team Champions in history. 

RJ: Yes, yes. Great question, thank you Kellyanne. This is completely nonsensical to us. Gavin made some statements and the Lamestream Media went with this false narrative that the Silent Majority is “all talk.”. That is not it all. 

LHS: No, we are not all talk, but everyone is indeed, talking about us. Take Gavin for example. He held a press conference, not unlike we are doing today.

RJ: We inspired him so much that he started holding Press Conferences, just like we do.

LHS: But unlike him, people are here because they care about what we say, unlike some dirty Canadian. 

RJ: He’s a nasty woman. 

LHS: That is absolutely correct. 

RJ: But we are here today to say that we are more than talk. We are the Silent Majority, and we are here to bring you all a better SCW.

The reporters in the back roll their eyes again and groan. Meanwhile, Kellyanne in front continues to nod in approval.

Lucy points to another reporter who raises their hand. 

Reporter: Aubrianna also recently showed up on SCW TV talking about this match. She had made some statements that you two were “children,” who would end up failing on Breakdown?

LHS: It’s funny that someone who has yet to successfully debut is calling us failure. She thought she was being clever, giving us a history lesson on a subject that every average American learns about in tenth grade. She equated herself to Manifest Destiny, likening herself to America thinking it was their right to move to the West. In reality, she is less the idea of Manifest Destiny and more Donner Party. For those of you watching at home, the Donner Party ate each other after a failed attempt at reaching the West during the era of Manifest Destiny.

RJ: What we’re saying, is that people who resorted to cannibalism were closer to being a successful idea of Manifest Destiny than Aubrianna.

LHS: If there is anyone in SCW that embodies, Manifest Destiny, it is the Silent Majority.

RJ: No doubt about it.

LHS: We are the simply the best, the greatest, the most successful, because we live every single day of our lives Manifest Destiny-ing. 

RJ: We believe our American Dream is one worth expanding into all parts of the world. We, the Silent Majority want to do nothing more than to drain the swamp here in SCW. That is how we are living our best Manifest Destiny lives. We want to ensure that SCW is better for everyone, and by everyone, we mean us and the people who agree with us. 

LHS: Exactly. But, I will applaud Ariana-

Reporter: Aubrianna…

LHS: Audriana, that’s what I said. I applaud her for doing her research on America. I just wish it wasn’t so obvious that she was going to help that filthy Canadian, Gavin, cheat on his citizenship test. She wanted to give us a history lesson on the most amazing country, America, so I thought it’d be a good idea for us to give a little history lesson on her.  

RJ: Well, first things first, Aubrianna Powers is clearly North Korean. 

A few hands fly up from the pool of reporters.

RJ: No, we will not be taking questions on this matter.

The hands start to slowly go back down, Ricky gestures towards Lucy to continue her speech.

LHS: Like I was saying, Adrienne was trying to show us that she studied 10th grade US History and used it to talk about how she hasn’t had the Most Valuable Debut yet. What she doesn’t understand is the things she read in her textbook during homeroom this morning…

Reporter: ...She’s in her 20’s?...

LHS: Like I said, obvious North Korean high school student, Audry Powers, told us she is going to “manifest her destiny,” on Breakdown. What I can’t seem to figure out is how she thinks she is in any way relatable to the most inspiring event to ever happen to this country that wasn’t the creation of I.C.E. Her and her no-ratings career are just one of the first stops on the Silent Majority’s mission to drain the swamp. 

Reporter: No ratings career?

LHS: What I’m saying, is that she is a loser.

RJ: Big loser.

LHS: That is an excellent point Ricky. 

RJ: The biggest issue I am having with this situation we’re being forced into, is I am just afraid. Not for myself, not for Lucy. I’m afraid for Gavin Taylor. 

Reporter: Why are you afraid for one of your opponents?

LHS: He never said he was afraid of him. He’s afraid for him.

RJ: Thank you Lucy, yes. I am afraid for him, not just because he is a Canadian, but because he willingly chose someone who for some reason calls themselves The Most Valuable but has only had six debut matches at this point because she can’t cross the border. She just cannot get that perfect debut match. 

LHS: Exactly, and just like border crossers, she’s a big time loser.

RJ: So I for one, am very confused why he chose someone like Aubrianna…

LHS: It’s Adrienne…

RJ: Why he chose someone like her to share his Mayhem Tag Team titles with. I mean, he should have chosen someone who’s done something great in their careers.

LHS: Exactly, he should have given both titles to Ricky James. 

RJ: I couldn’t have said it better myself.

LHS: This is something we knew would happen when we came to SCW. We knew that there would be naysayers and people who wouldn’t take us seriously. It’s absolutely despicable that just because we have different views than most of our colleagues, they shame us.

RJ: We’ve already had colleagues attempt to “cancel us,” because of our views, just because they’re different from some peoples.

LHS: But for us, we don’t care what any of these sheeple have to say. 

LHS: We will not be taking any more questions at this time. It is now time for our closing statements. 

RJ: This week on Breakdown, you will all witness a showcase of AMERICAN strength, athleticism, and determination. You will see what happens when a Canadian born wrestler faces a true American. And I hope, after we defeat Gavin and Aubrianna, that they choose to join us in our mission to restore true American values in Supreme Championship Wrestling. While Gavin will never receive my full respect, his decision to join us in our fight would go a long way. Perhaps he could use his influence in Canada to educate those people. Perhaps he can communicate better with Shady Sasha and help her realize the errors of her ways. But before that can happen, Gavin will have to learn firsthand just what it means to be a TRUE AMERICAN.

LHS: He will learn the hard way what happens when you mess with something like our life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Arianna Grande and Gavin Taylor will understand why we are the Silent Majority, and why we will be silent no longer. We’re here to show how much better SCW can be. 

RJ: The swamp has been run by people like Aubrianna and Gavin for far too long. They’ve held onto their titles as SCW Mayhem Tag Team Champions for much too long. We support everyone’s right to use their First Amendment Rights, but I draw the line at openly admitting you support a Candian turncoat.

LHS: So on Breakdown, we will implore you to take notice of us. To understand what I mean, I will revisit the idea of Manifest Destiny. Unlike our opponents, we will better embody what our great ancestors were aiming to do. We will be just like those men and women, crossing the great plains to the West. 

RJ: The Silent Majority will be the ones who will be headed West, in search of a better life. 

LHS: And that better life starts, with a better SCW. So, as always, remember...

RJ: I’m Ricky James.

LHS: And I am Lucy Huckabee Sanders, Official Press Secretary of SCW.

Together: We are The Silent Majority.

Lucy Huckabee Sanders. Ricky James. For a better SCW.