12-27-2018, 11:37 PM
(A camera switches on inside a dimly lit industrial building with factory equipment barely visible in the background. A dark-haired woman walks into frame and turns around to face the camera, folding her arms and leaning to one side.)
My name is Jordan Majors, and I'm not only entering this year's invitational -- I'm winning it.
I know what you're saying right now. Who in the hell is Jordan Majors and what in the hell is she talking about. Well the first thing you need to know is it doesn't matter what you do and don't know about me and the second thing to know is I WILL be winning the invitational. This isn't a joke, dear. Don't read past what I'm saying and just get yourself lost in the details of who is and isn't in this match. I could care less who they are. The fact is SCW could use a fresh face, an upgrade from its current, dreadful form. Consider what I'm bringing to the table to be a face lift or a new lease on life, or whatever you want it to be called, just make sure you aren't overlooking what I'm about to do.
They say at the end of the year it's out with the old and in with the new. Now I don't want to get hung up on the whole holiday theme I'm sure you're about to find every other participant in this event force feeding you with until you fall into a coma, but there is something to that old phrase. When you look at me, you're staring directly at the next evolution in this business. You're looking at a one-woman revolution that's about to take this place by storm. I'm absolutely sure to be completely overlooked by all the so-called veterans that are greasing themselves up in the back to look worked up in the match. I'm the type that will out-work them, out-fight them and down right out-class them when we throw down in the ring. While they're stuffing their faces in catering at night and running the treadmills in the morning to try and chase those pounds away, I'm coming right back at them with an unmatched physique, unbelievably hard right kick and unstoppable charisma that they can't possibly keep up with. When I debut in the match, nothing will ever be the same again.
(Jordan leans to the other side and smirks)
You're probably scratching your head now and racking your fourth-grade educated brain to try and figure out who I am and why I'm here. I'm what SCW fans have been dreaming of. I'm the type of talent that only comes once in a generation and can't be humbled. I've spent my entire life in a wrestling ring. I was practically born in a wrestling ring. While most of you were going to schools and learning how to get someone to the mat and trap them in some sort of complicated hold, I was learning from everyone I could how to plant you into the mat and make sure you not only can't get up, but you don't want to. I learned how to kick you so hard that you will feel it for days after. My kicks can make you feel like you were powerbombed through a table. Let me help you visualize the experience of fighting me. I pick you apart with my kicks, smashing your shins and knees with pinpoint accuracy until you can barely stand, and then I take out your arms. And then it's kicks to the abs and ribs that make it hard to breathe. All before I clean your clock with kicks to the side of the head that make you see stars and planets from galaxies you didn't even know existed. And then as you're laying on that mat, my mat, trying to pick up the pieces, I comes flying from the top and land square on your midsection, forcing every bit of air out of your lungs and making it hard to get back to your feet. Oh, and when you do, that's when I strike like a cobra from within the tall grass, putting the final nail in your coffin with a cutter from any angle. You'll never see that one coming. And that's the end.
But why are you doing this, Jordan? Hell, I'm doing it for me. I'm doing it for SCW and its fans. But, well, mostly for me. I don't know any of you. I don't know Steve or Janice from Top or Sally, but my kicks don't discriminate. I'd kick my own grandmother out of the ring and into the front row if it meant I would be the winner. I'm sure you probably all think I need that money. You don't know me so you assume I'm just showing up, talking a big talk and hoping that I can somehow escape with that cash. The money doesn't mean anything to me. Not a bit. All I care about is leaving this event with the bragging rights that come with winning this match and the proof I have to offer to the SCW roster that their precious little worlds are about to be turned on their heads.
This company needs a hero. This company needs a savior to swoop in and keep it from falling into the fires of its own demise. And from the ashes of what has already been burned, I am rising and challenging what you all have decided is normal. I'm here destroying the status quo and breaking down the walls that have previously been built. They'll say I can't do it because I'm new. They'll say I don't stand a chance. But they'll all be wrong. I'm the one you should all be watching. And I'm the one they'll all be fearing after this is said and done.
(Jordan takes a few steps forward and bends down with her face right at the camera.)
It's time for a new face to rise from the crowd. It's time to shake things up a little bit -- or should I say a lotta bit. Jordan Majors is here. I hope you're ready because nothing will ever be the same again.
(Jordan winks and blows a kiss to the camera before the video goes dark.)
My name is Jordan Majors, and I'm not only entering this year's invitational -- I'm winning it.
I know what you're saying right now. Who in the hell is Jordan Majors and what in the hell is she talking about. Well the first thing you need to know is it doesn't matter what you do and don't know about me and the second thing to know is I WILL be winning the invitational. This isn't a joke, dear. Don't read past what I'm saying and just get yourself lost in the details of who is and isn't in this match. I could care less who they are. The fact is SCW could use a fresh face, an upgrade from its current, dreadful form. Consider what I'm bringing to the table to be a face lift or a new lease on life, or whatever you want it to be called, just make sure you aren't overlooking what I'm about to do.
They say at the end of the year it's out with the old and in with the new. Now I don't want to get hung up on the whole holiday theme I'm sure you're about to find every other participant in this event force feeding you with until you fall into a coma, but there is something to that old phrase. When you look at me, you're staring directly at the next evolution in this business. You're looking at a one-woman revolution that's about to take this place by storm. I'm absolutely sure to be completely overlooked by all the so-called veterans that are greasing themselves up in the back to look worked up in the match. I'm the type that will out-work them, out-fight them and down right out-class them when we throw down in the ring. While they're stuffing their faces in catering at night and running the treadmills in the morning to try and chase those pounds away, I'm coming right back at them with an unmatched physique, unbelievably hard right kick and unstoppable charisma that they can't possibly keep up with. When I debut in the match, nothing will ever be the same again.
(Jordan leans to the other side and smirks)
You're probably scratching your head now and racking your fourth-grade educated brain to try and figure out who I am and why I'm here. I'm what SCW fans have been dreaming of. I'm the type of talent that only comes once in a generation and can't be humbled. I've spent my entire life in a wrestling ring. I was practically born in a wrestling ring. While most of you were going to schools and learning how to get someone to the mat and trap them in some sort of complicated hold, I was learning from everyone I could how to plant you into the mat and make sure you not only can't get up, but you don't want to. I learned how to kick you so hard that you will feel it for days after. My kicks can make you feel like you were powerbombed through a table. Let me help you visualize the experience of fighting me. I pick you apart with my kicks, smashing your shins and knees with pinpoint accuracy until you can barely stand, and then I take out your arms. And then it's kicks to the abs and ribs that make it hard to breathe. All before I clean your clock with kicks to the side of the head that make you see stars and planets from galaxies you didn't even know existed. And then as you're laying on that mat, my mat, trying to pick up the pieces, I comes flying from the top and land square on your midsection, forcing every bit of air out of your lungs and making it hard to get back to your feet. Oh, and when you do, that's when I strike like a cobra from within the tall grass, putting the final nail in your coffin with a cutter from any angle. You'll never see that one coming. And that's the end.
But why are you doing this, Jordan? Hell, I'm doing it for me. I'm doing it for SCW and its fans. But, well, mostly for me. I don't know any of you. I don't know Steve or Janice from Top or Sally, but my kicks don't discriminate. I'd kick my own grandmother out of the ring and into the front row if it meant I would be the winner. I'm sure you probably all think I need that money. You don't know me so you assume I'm just showing up, talking a big talk and hoping that I can somehow escape with that cash. The money doesn't mean anything to me. Not a bit. All I care about is leaving this event with the bragging rights that come with winning this match and the proof I have to offer to the SCW roster that their precious little worlds are about to be turned on their heads.
This company needs a hero. This company needs a savior to swoop in and keep it from falling into the fires of its own demise. And from the ashes of what has already been burned, I am rising and challenging what you all have decided is normal. I'm here destroying the status quo and breaking down the walls that have previously been built. They'll say I can't do it because I'm new. They'll say I don't stand a chance. But they'll all be wrong. I'm the one you should all be watching. And I'm the one they'll all be fearing after this is said and done.
(Jordan takes a few steps forward and bends down with her face right at the camera.)
It's time for a new face to rise from the crowd. It's time to shake things up a little bit -- or should I say a lotta bit. Jordan Majors is here. I hope you're ready because nothing will ever be the same again.
(Jordan winks and blows a kiss to the camera before the video goes dark.)