Gimmick Battle Royal

[The Matt]

“The following advertisement is paid for by someone is totally NOT Kimberly Williams pretending to be Marie Jones! Absolutely not! She would never do that, even though she did once do that before…ok twice she did it…ok, several times…but nope, never again, and not just to enter a battle royal and hopefully try to set a record for most matches participated in at one single Rise To Greatness event.”

“Did you get all that? Good. Now pay attention!”

Gold sparked fall…it is almost like static on a television set but only gold and glittery! A few moments later the scene becomes clearer and clearer. Then we see a beautiful redhead stepping into the scene from the right. This lovely lady is dressed in a black knee length dress, black high heel sandals, and a black leather jacket.

“Hello everyone! My name is Marie Annabelle Jones! That’s right, MARIE JONES! The Phoenix! I am TOTALLY NOT Kimberly Williams pretending to be my identical twin sister!” She shakes her head. “Nope, absolutely not! I stopped…err, I mean SHE stopped doing that a long time ago. She promised the judicial system here in Massachusetts to never again kidnap her, lock her in a basement, and take scantily clad pics and post them all over the internet as if they were of Marie…I mean me! Sooooo right, I am NOT Kim! I am Marie!”

Just then the Dalek rolls into the scene. It has the SCW Underground Championship hanging from its plunger. “EXCUSE ME MISTRESS KIMBERLY! DO YOU WISH TO HAVE YOUR CHAMPIONSHIP BELT WITH YOU DURING THIS PROMOTIONAL SHOOT?!”

“Get away from me you stupid tin can!” Totally Not Kimberly Williams Pretending To Be Marie Jones kicks the Dalek. She takes the title belt and throws it as hard as she can. “Go fetch!”

“FETCH! FETCH! FETCH!” The Dalek wheels away. She sighs and turns to face the camera.

“Now then where was I? Oh yes! Rise To Greatness is coming up and I know my Kimmymania…err, wait, what does she…uh, I mean, what do I call my fanbase again? Phoenix Fans! Yeah! I know my Phoenix Fans are excited about yours truly making a special appearance in the Gimmick Battle Royal at Rise To Greatness!” Suddenly she winces. Clearly in pain. “Fuck! How the hell does Marie walk in these stupid ass shoes?! It’s like I’m walking on a damn pair of stilts and…” and suddenly she realizes that the camera is rolling. She smiles sheepishly. “...uh, yeah! I LOVE WEARING HIGH HEELS! I like being all fancy and shit!”

“So get ready for HISTORY to be made! And I do not necessarily mean that Kimberly would make history by competing in three matches on the same damn card! Although that would be awesome, am I right? But history will be made when I, MARIE JONES, compete in the gimmick battle royal, because I am definitely Marie Jones…not Kimberly Williams!”